Hear ye, those seeking enlightenment - you have come to the end of your long journey. To gain enlightenment -
1. Sign the guestbook.
2. Mail two self addressed and stamped envelopes, with personal details to me.
3. Attach a demand draft for 11.95$ in favour of Pain Inc.
You will hence avail of my exclusive correspondance course - ENEMA (Entirely Needless Evil Maniacal Anthology), which will give training in -
1. Sarcasam
2. Humour
3. Torure
4. Hacking
5. Pure evil
6. Organ Extraction *
7. Creative Writing
8. Advanced mathematics
* First 50 applications will recieve a free copy of my latest book - Brain Surgery For Dummies (published hardcover by Penguin Books and Indian Edition by Rupa Publications)
Just listen to these rave reviews-
1. ENEMA changed my life. I won the elections because I knew how to write tortorously long speeches, which had my opponents crying for mercy - George W. Bush
2. ENEMA is a must for all people who claim to have a social moral sense - how else would they know how to perform anatomical modifications to enable super long hunger strikes - Medha Patkar
3. ENEMA is what enabled me to effectively mould the philosiphy of my regime, and gave me tips for getting rid of a certain section of society - Adolf Hitler
4. ENEMA taught me to write lyrics which was extensively used by doctors, as they completely eliminated the need for laxatives - Javed Akthar
5. ENEMA is a tool for all sadists and paedophiles - how else would I have been able to torure hundreds of generations of children by making them study my calculus - Isaac Newton
6. ENEMA is the quickest route to riches and international fame, not to mention the hot women, as without it, I would not have been able to write books that are so horrible, people think they are great - Salman Rushdie.
So come one, come all. Join the social revolution.
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